Killing Time

It is already the first weekend of the month. I hope that everyone has a good one, spent with family and friends. As for me and my family, it's going to be the usual weekend where we just relax and spend time together. No special trips this weekend though, we are saving that up on the third week because we are expecting friends over the weekend. I wonder where we're going to take them... Hmmm... But we are going out later for our monthly prayer meeting for the Blessed Virgin Mary.

My hands are full today but I am feeling restless. And when I feel restless, I know that I have to stay still for a few minutes and quiet down. My little red book entitled Hearts On Fire (Praying with the Jesuits) has always been handy in moments like this.

While browsing through the pages of this beloved book, I coincidentally chanced upon this prayer by Leo Rock, SJ. A lovely prayer that talks about how man kills time.

Killing Time

How do I kill time?
Let me count the ways.

By worrying about things
over which I have no control.
Like the past.
Like the future.

By harboring resentment
and anger
over hurts
real or imagined.

By disdaining the ordinary
or, rather, what I
so mindlessly
call ordinary.

By concern over what's in it for me,
rather than what's in me
for it.

By failing to appreciate what is
because of might-have-beens,
should-have-beens,
could-have-beens.

These are some of the ways
I kill time.

Jesus didn't kill time.
He gave life to it.
His own.

A very beautiful prayer don't you agree? It made me think twice because most of the ways to kill time that is mentioned in the prayer are applicable time. It overwhelms me to learn that I have been killing time all along... I did not do it intentionally though because I mean well. Thanks to this prayer, I am now made conscious of all my petty concerns and selfish interests. I have to work on not killing my time anymore. For my own peace of mind.

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It's Holy Week!

It has been a while since I updated this blog. A month to be exact... I have been busy with online tasks and some contests aside from my usual routine as a Mom and as a follower of Christ. And tomorrow, it's already Palm Sunday, the beginning of what we call the Holy Week in the Catholic tradition. In some countries, like in the Philippines, and also in Germany, the Holy Week is observed and is even declared officially a national holiday, especially Thursdays (Holy Thursday), Fridays (Good Friday), Saturdays (Black Saturday) and Sundays (Easter Sunday).

This is a big celebration in the Catholic tradition because it commemorates the death and resurrection of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

It's Palm Sunday tomorrow and our Sto. Nino Group will be celebrating a mass in English in advance today. But why do we celebrate Palm Sunday? This is to remember and reflect on the beginning of the many events that followed in Jesus' life to fulfill the scriptures and the prophecy.

In between Palm Sunday and Easter Sunday, we are given the time to remember and reflect on the details of the Passion of Jesus. One can say that the last week of Jesus' life was "crammed" with events: it started with his glorious entry into Jerusalem and ended with his death on Good Friday. In between those, Jesus preached and taught, presided over the Passover meal, stood trial and was condemned to death.

If you have been praying the Rosary, you'd be familiar with most of the events but way before the Agony of Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane, there is the entry of Jesus into Jerusalem in which he rode a colt. This is to fulfill the prophecy found in Zechariah 9:9. "The people greeted him by placing palm leaves on the path the he passed, as though he were an earthly king; they were sure He would end the Roman occupation and Jerusalem would again be a Jewish city. They shouted, "Hosanna," which means "save us," and comes from Psalm 118: 26."

During the Holy Week, there are Passion Plays, Reading of the Seven Last Words, the Way of the Cross (which most pilgrims perform on Good Friday). This is to remember his passion and death and reflect on our lives. And we fast during the Lenten season. It is not only about not eating meat and drinking alcoholic drinks, it is mostly about depriving oneself of the material pleasures of the earth. If one loves to go shopping, one sacrifices and lets a week pass without going on a shopping spree. Or if one loves to dress up, one opts to dress simply and modestly instead. Or if one is addicted to Facebook or the Internet, one opts to do other worthy tasks like reading the Bible and taking time to reflect. It's all about depriving oneself of the things that gives him material satisfaction and earthly pleasures. These are just very small things (and so much a part of our daily life) in comparison to what Jesus had to sacrifice, HIS LIFE, so why don't we all give it a try?

If you can avail and go on a Holy Week Retreat, join one! If being physically present in a retreat is made impossible by a number of circumstances, there is a an ONLINE JESUIT RETREAT that you can attend. It is conducted by Fr. Johnny Go, SJ and is called "MEETING PLACES". It is a three day retreat, which starts on Maundy Thursday, April 1.

To quote Fr. Go's words in his blog:

I've called it "MEETING PLACES" because I think the mysteries of Holy Week unfold in three Lenten places: the Garden (Holy Thursday), the Hill (Good Friday), and the Tomb (Black Saturday). If we spend some time in those virtual meeting places, we may encounter the Lord in a special way.

Interested in joining? An essential part of this retreat is to prepare yourself because it is more importantly an opportunity to pray about your own life. You can start preparing by clicking here.

Let me leave you with a beautiful Jesuit song: How Lovely Is Your Dwelling Place. I hope that this Holy Week, you will find that your heart and soul is God's dwelling place.



I wish everyone a blessed and meaningful Holy Week! May God bless us all...

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God Always Provides

I have experienced, time and again, that God always provides. Even if you don't utter it in your mouth. Even if you just ignore the problem and don't worry yourself too much about it. Even if things seem too impossible. Even if you just whisper it in your heart. At the right moment, at the most unexpected time, the Lord has surprised me, hubby and me, us, with His Saving Grace.

Surely, there is no one as great as Him who always provides and who always knows what we desire. YES, He grants our heart's desires and aids us in our needs in His own way, in His own Time.

Glory and praise be to OUR GOD WHO ALWAYS PROVIDES.

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Huwag Kang Mangamba

I was so afraid and worried about Samantha the past six days. She had been sick and I was worried that it might be the dreaded swine-flu. But my heart tells me to have faith and trust in the Lord. In my heart, I know that He won't allow anything to happen to her. And so everyday I pray...

While we were at the hospital, I was given the opportunity to spend the entire three days with my daughter and reading the bible. While at the hospital, I was able to rest my stressed and weary body too. I guess you can call it blessing in disguise. I call it God's plan at work. And I am happy because I was able to learn something from my scripture readings. I read the entire book of Esther and 1st and 2nd Samuel and learned a little bit more about our God Almighty. He is a jealous God and a great God BUT He is faithful to His people. And I know that I should not worry because for as long as I put my trust in Him, all shall be well.

And here's a Jesuit song that has reminded me, time and again, to not be afraid:

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Simeon's Canticle

Who is Simeon, you might ask? He is the biblical character mentioned in Luke 2 who met the Virgin Mary, Joseph and Jesus as they entered the temple to fulfill the requirement of Moses' Law on the event of the fourtieth day from Jesus' birth. He is a just and devout man of Jerusalem. He took Jesus in his arms when he saw him and said the prayer Nunc dimitis or Canticle of Simeon. This prayer is usually sung during the Advent season, as we await the birth of Jesus.

Simeon's Canticle
Music by: Manoling Francisco, SJ
Arrangement: Paulo K Tirol
Soloist: Celia Uy
Keyboards: Paulo K Tirol

Lord, let Your servant go in peace
For Your Word has been fulfilled.

A Child shall be born to the Virgin,
And His Name shall be called, "Emmanuel."

My own eyes have seen Your salvation
Which You have prepared for all men.

A Light shall reveal to the nations
And the glory of Your people, Israel.

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God Of Silence

This song, beautiful and simple, reminds me of lots of things. My childhood, my awakening as a Christian, my reflections and retreats, my volunteer years and so much more. God may be silent but He works in mysterious ways. In the recesses of our hearts, He is there, waiting... silently waiting for us to call on Him. And although I cannot see my God, I believe, I trust, I love.

Here are the lyrics of the song:

The God of silence beckons me
To journey to my heart
Where He awaits
O Lord, I hear You calling tenderly
To You I come to gaze
At the beauty of Your face I cannot see

To rest in Your embrace I cannot feel
To dwell in Your love hurting but sweet
To be with You; to glimpse eternity

God of night, fount of all my delight.
Show Your light . . . that my heart, like Yours, burn bright.

Be still the torment of the night
Will not encumber you, if you believe
My child this darkness isn't emptiness
For here I mold your heart
Unto My image painfully you long to see

The self you yearn to be, but fear to know
The world from which you flee in Me find home
All these I give you, if you remain in Me

COUNTERPOINT:
I am ever here
My child, you need not fear
The dark will set you free
And bring your heart to Me

CODA:
The God of silence beckons me
To journey to my heart
Where He awaits me.

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The Windhover

Here is a beautiful poem from Gerard Manley Hopkins, SJ. The images presented are powerful and majestic, as a tribute to Christ, the King. For indeed, Jesus is King - great in His love and powerful to resist the temptations of the devil. Mighty is our God who lived among us and saved us all from death.

I caught this morning morning's minion,
kingdom of daylight's dauphin, dapple-dawn-drawn Falcon,
in his riding of the rolling level underneath him steady air, and striding
High there, how he rung upon the rein of a wimpling wing
In his ecstasy! then off, off forth on swing,
As a skate's heel sweeps smooth on a bow-bend; the hurl and gliding
Rebuffed the big wind. My heart is hiding
Stirred for a bird, - the achieve of, the mastery of the thing!

Brute beauty and valour are act, oh, air, pride, plume here
Buckle! AND the fire that breaks from thee then, a billion
Times told lovelier, more dangerous, O my chevalier!

No wonder of it: sheer plod makes plough down sillion
Shine, and blue-bleak embers, ah my dear,
Fall, gall themselves, and gash gold-vermilion.

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Patient Trust

Above all, trust in the slow work of God
We are quite naturally impatient in everything
to reach the end without delay.
We should like to skip the intermediate stages.
We are impatient of being on the way to something
unknown, something new.
And yet it is the law of all progress
that it is made by passing through
some stages of instability -
and that it may take a very long time.

And so I think it is with you.
your ideas mature gradually - let them grow,
let them shape themselves, without undue haste.
Don't try to force them on,
as though you could be today what time
(that is to say, grace and circumstances
acting on your own good will)
will make of you tomorrow.

Only God could say what this new spirit
gradually forming within you will be.
Give Our Lord the benefit of believing
that his hand is leading you,
and accept the anxiety of feeling yourself
in suspense and incomplete.

- Pierre Teilhard de Chardin SJ

This is such a very profound prayer by Fr. Pierre. Reflecting on his words, it beckons me to continue to be patient with God and to completely trust that all things will just fall into place in His Time.

Like all living things, we must allow our plans, our experiences, our dreams, our hopes and aspirations to gradually mature and grow within us and lift them up to God. Because in life, there are no shortcuts nor quick detours. Quick fix solutions do not really improve or solve things... they only numb and give temporary relief. Only in God's leading and able hands are we able to feel contentment and satisfaction and the relief that no other worldly thing can ever give.

So trust in Him. And be patient. And in this Christmas season, may the joy and glory and excitement of the advent season remind us how patient Our Father had been with us. All these years, he had been patient with us.

Isn't it about time we put our trust in Him for a change?

God bless you.

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God of My Life

Only in love can I find you, my God.
In love the gates of my soul spring open,
allowing me to breathe a new air of freedom
and forget my own petty self.In love my whole being streams forth
out of the rigid confines of narrowness and anxious self-assertion,
which makes me a prisoner of my own poverty and emptiness.
In love all the powers of my soul flow outward to you,
wanting never more to return, but to lose themselves completely in you,
since by your love you are the inmost center of my heart,
closer to me than I am to myself.

But when I love you,when I manage to break out of the narrow cirle of self
and leave behind the restless agony of unanswered questions,
when my blinded eyes no longer look merely from afar
and from the outside upon your unapproachable brightness,
and much more when you yourself, O Incomprehensible One,
have become through love the inmost center of my life,
then I can bury myself entirely in you, O mysterious God,
and with myself all my questions.
- Karl Rahner SJ

This is a Jesuit prayer so profound and full of faith and love in God that simply explains that only in love can man find God. I really love the words in this prayer as they are very powerful and can really be felt. I hope I had Fr. Rahner's eloquent words to express my love for God yet words seem to abandon me. Perhaps it is because I have not really and totally surrendered myself to Him who is Mysterious and All-Knowing. As a Christian, I still consider myself as lacking or inadequate in faith. I admit I still have a lot to learn and the journey is still long until I can finally say that I have buried myself entirely in God. I am still seeking for answers to the many questions in life. It is said that if you entrust everything to God, then you need not ask questions but instead, completely give Him control of your life. But human as I am, I still have the tendency to reason and choose my will over God's. I know I still have a lot to learn. And I know that I have to one day break out of my narrow-mindedness and allow God to rule in my life so that I may totally feel His Most Sacred Love for me.

May God bless us always.

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Praying with Jesuits: the Anima Christi

Soul of Christ

Jesus, may all that is you flow into me.
May your body and blood be my food and drink.
May your passion and death be my strength and life.
Jesus, with you by my side enough has been given.
May the shelter I seek be the shadow of your cross.
Let me not run from the love which you offer,
But hold me safe from the forces of evil.
On each of my dyings shed your light and your love.
Keep calling to me until that day comes,
When, with your saints, I may praise you forever. Amen.

- David L. Fleming SJ

Note: Every Saturday, beginning today, I will be posting Jesuit prayers that have touched me deeply and helped me in my journey as a Christian and Catholic. It is my hope and prayer that through this Praying with Jesuits prayers, your lives may be touched as well. May your days be blessed! AMDG.

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